Tag: personal-growth

Feelings & Fire, messy progress, Reflection

When Surviving Feels Like Failing

Mindrah

Life.
Sometimes life just… sucks.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve got a million ideas swirling in your head. You want to do them all. You want them done yesterday. But then life gets in the way.

For me, it was a week of study visits, followed by a week of high-stress assignments and deadlines. It feels like forever since I touched the things I actually wanted to do. Instead of thriving, I’ve just been surviving.

And I hate surviving.

I created Ash & Ember Rising because I didn’t want to just get through life — I wanted to live it. Intentionally. Fully. Passionately. I want to do all the things. Ten-people’s worth of things, if I’m honest. And of course, that’s impossible… but still, I expect it of myself.

Which means sometimes it’s hard to match my wants, my wild expectations, with reality.

What happens when reality wins?

So what do you do when life doesn’t match the plan?
When deadlines eat your days, or stress fogs your brain, or you just can’t do the things you hoped you would?

You could walk away.
You could decide it isn’t worth it.
You could label it failure.

But here’s the truth:

Just because something didn’t happen the way you wanted or expected doesn’t make it worthless.
It doesn’t make you worthless.

It makes you human.

Still here. Still trying.

I didn’t finish everything I wanted. Some things didn’t happen at all. But I’m still here.

Still caring.
Still showing up.
Still trying, even when it’s messy.

And maybe,

sometimes,

that’s enough.

From surviving to rising

Ash & Ember Rising has always been about this: turning the sparks we have left, even when everything feels burnt out, into steps forward.

So if you’re here, tired, behind, feeling like you’ve lost the thread of your own story — know this:

You’re not failing.
You’re still becoming.
And you’re allowed to start again, as many times as it takes.

Because surviving is not the end of your story. It’s just the messy middle. And the ember is still glowing.

Feelings & Fire, Reflection

The Stories We Carry (And Rewrite)

Mindrah

This week I want to talk to you about stories.
Stories we tell ourselves.
And stories other people tell about us.

You see, my family tells a lot of stories about me.
They say I’m fat, and therefore I must be unfit.
They say I never exercise, which reinforces their belief that I don’t care about my health.
They say I never go outside.
They say I don’t care about them.

I don’t share this for sympathy. I share it because it bothers me and because deep down, I know it’s not true.
And yet, hearing the same story enough times can start to plant roots. You begin to wonder: What if they’re right?

But here’s the reality:
I’ve lost over 40kg.
I did that by waking up before dawn, walking most days, and showing up for myself even when it was hard.
I walk outside. I leave the house five days a week for work.
I studied full-time while working full-time because I care deeply about building a better future.
And even when exhausted, I still showed up for my family. I called. I checked in. I listened. I made time.

Imagine if I had listened to their version of my story.
Imagine if I believed them.
Worse, imagine if I started telling myself those same things.

If I had, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be healthier, stronger, halfway through a Master’s degree, or learning how to rebuild when life suddenly veers off course.

This morning, everything feels a bit broken. My plans have unraveled. My path feels uncertain.
But instead of saying, “I can’t do this,” I’ve been drafting a new game plan.
A new story.

And now I’m wondering about you.

What stories are being told about you, by others, or by yourself, that need to be rewritten?
What falsehoods have been repeated so often they started to feel like truth?

Because me? I think you’ve got this.
You’re still becoming.
You’re still growing.

Remember the power of yet.
And write yourself a story worth living in.

Feelings & Fire, Printable Packs

A Day in Your Dreams

Mindrah

Last week, we took the first step.

I shared a bit about how I’ve been crawling my way out of survival mode and starting to ask myself what kind of life I want to live — not someday, but now. Not all of it, not perfectly, but piece by piece.

That post came with a simple journal prompt. Just a quiet invitation to think:
“If I could change things… what would I want to feel?”

And now we’re ready for the next part.

Gentle Next Steps

This time, I wanted to do something a little different — something slower, softer, and maybe a bit dreamy. I made a guided visualisation called A Day in Your Dreams (see below). It’s not about imagining some big, impossible future. It’s just about picturing a day that feels calm and kind — one that feels like you.

You can listen to the video if you’d like to be gently walked through it, or you can explore the printable that goes with it. Some people think better with their eyes closed. Some people like pens and pages. Some of us need both.

Whatever works for you is the right way to start.

About the Printable

The free printable will be shared in this blog once it’s ready (I’m just finalising it now!). It offers space to reflect on one moment at a time — morning, midday, evening — and includes gentle prompts like:

  • What does your space look like?
  • How do you feel as you wake up?
  • What’s one small detail you’d love to bring into real life?

Each section has a little spark of encouragement from one of our Ash & Ember Rising mascots — like Zalyn the Motivation Mermaid, who reminds you that it’s okay to dream boldly and still take your time.

Download the printable

A Day in Your Dreams

What’s Coming Next

In the next blog, we’ll choose one of the moments from your visualised day — maybe your ideal morning routine, or a peaceful workspace, or a little thing that brought joy — and we’ll start to explore how to bring that into your real life.

We’ll go slowly.
We’ll start small.
We’ll do it together.

Because dreaming matters — but doing it gently? That’s where the magic starts.

Let’s Journal It!

Last week I also started to show you what it might look like to start journaling. Here is what today’s post invites you to do next — pause, imagine, and spend a moment inside the version of your life you’re hoping to build.

(coming soon)

Feelings & Fire, Reflection

Choosing Yourself Isn’t Giving Up

Mindrah

Since I first created the Ash & Ember Rising blog, I’ve posted every Monday like clockwork.
But this week Monday came and went… and I didn’t post.
I didn’t plan to skip it. I didn’t battle with it.
I simply… forgot.

Why?

Because life got heavier.

I took on a fuller load at work — just for two weeks, and yes, I can handle it, and yes, it is needed. But it’s more work, which means more stress.
I have three major assignments due at the end of those same two weeks.
And then I got sick.
And I’m tired.
And I’ve been really, truly, just surviving.

The kind of surviving where brushing your teeth feels like a quest.
Where hydration becomes an achievement.
Where your body wants to stop — but your deadlines don’t.

So hello, overwhelm.
And welcome, guilt.

Guilt?
Yep. He showed up loud and dramatic, like always.

Because I missed a blog post.
And the perfectionist in me? The completionist in me?
They’re spiraling.

“This is the end!”
“You failed!”
“You gave up!”
“You didn’t finish the thing — so now it doesn’t count!”

That’s what they think.

But I know better.

Choosing Yourself Isn’t Giving Up

I know that during these two weeks, I’m going to have to choose.
I’m going to have to let things go.
Not because I’m lazy. Not because I’m weak. But because I matter.

And moving past survival — into something resembling stability — means being intentional.
It means choosing what to spend time and energy on.
Because if I try to do it all anyway?

Then I’m not choosing growth.
I’m choosing misery.
And I deserve better than that.

We’re Taught to Burn Ourselves Alive

We are taught — over and over — that we must juggle a hundred things.
Flawlessly.
Without pause.
Even when we’re sick.

But that’s not care. That’s collapse.

Choosing yourself is hard.
It feels rebellious. Shameful. Lazy.
But it’s not.

It’s what lets you keep going.
It’s what lets you come back.

Missing a blog post doesn’t mean my dream is dead.
It just means I’m choosing to live long enough to carry it forward.

A Reminder, For You (and Me)

My dreams will still be there when I feel better.
They’ll still be there when I have time.
They are not made of glass.

That email isn’t going to explode if you don’t answer it today.
Those dishes will still be there tomorrow.
Your work? Will probably thank you for showing up rested, not wrecked.

You don’t have to do it all.

You just have to choose.
Choose your health.
Choose your peace.
Choose you.

Even when it’s hard.
Especially when it’s hard.

Fire & Fuel, Reflection

Tired, Tender, and Trying Anyway

Mindrah

Hello fellow adventurers.

Today’s blog is a little tender. I want to talk to you about my Health, fitness and movement journey — it’s been a complicated road.

If you’ve read my first blog or about me page you’ll know that one day I finally opened my eyes and found myself at the bottoms of a pit.

Not literally.

I didn’t recognise the life I was living.
Nothing looked like what I had ever imagined.

So…
I took the first step to reclaiming me.

I started with my health and with my body.

Because after years of neglect, I was

Tired
Exhausted
Sore
Suffering
Over weight
Overwhelmed
Dying
(Dramatic)

And I knew, I couldn’t keep going like this.

And I knew, it would hurt to try. But it already hurt not to.

So I gave up on starting tomorrow.
And I gave up on being perfect.

And I tried.

Along the way I found so many things that didn’t work for me.

But I didn’t quit. I just showed up again the next day to try again. Or to try something else. And sometimes, scarily, I tried something new.

And, after a lot of trial and error, sometimes I found something that worked.

It was hard to give up on perfect but in the messy process, I learned, I flourished, I flounder and step by messy, painful step, I figured it out.

I knew that my weight loss battle would be 80% what I eat but knowing is not understand and it definitely is not applying.

So I got help.

This time not from a book. Because I’ve read, I read and read and read but (embarrassingly) I never understood.
I found someone I could talk to.
A mentor to teach and guide me.
And a community to celebrate and commiserate whenever the need arises.

Eventually I completely changed what I eat each day but I started slow. I started with the meal I struggled with the most. Breakfast. And then I worked to change the next thing.

I did it through trial and error. I tried new foods. I learnt just how fussy I am.
I struggled with just how hard it can be to find healthy you also enjoy eating.
But I didn’t give up. Even when it wasn’t perfect.

I knew that 20% of my weight loss battle would be exercise. While my main priority was focusing on food, I also wanted to be fit. I wanted to make it up the four flights of stairs at work without dying. I started with walks. Five minutes, around the block, everyday. Then ten minutes. Then twenty.

And then when I was ready I moved on to weights and running.

I made slow and steady my mantra.
I reminded myself I am not running a race.
I’m making a life.
A life I can be proud of. A life I will be happy to live.

And now I wonder.
Can words really hope to capture the struggle?
Some days I cried.
Some I raged.
Some I hate.
Sometimes all I could do was breathe.

And the set backs were real.

I started a learn to run program that sang to my soul.
Then I developed Plantar Fasciitis and despite my stubbornness could no longer endure the pain of running.
I lost kilos.
Then had people who should be my biggest supporters make disparaging comments.
The scale went down.
Then back up.
And my clothes all got too big for me.
But I’m too scared to buy new ones in case o jinx it.
And then I looked into the mirror…

My struggles are proof that this journey is never smooth sailing. It’s a downright bumpy track.
Sometimes those bumps will knock you on your arse.

Let me help you get back up.
Let’s try again together.

In creating Ash & Ember Rising I’ve created a place to share my journey.
A place where we can journey together.
A place to share our adventures.

These are the processes I’ve been using put into printable format.
I hope they can help you too.
Because they are still helping me.

In each page you will find tools to guide you but most importantly you’ll find

Encouragement over guilt
Gentleness
Hope
Fire
Fuel
Realness over expectations

Fire & Fuel
Blogs to share wisdom and knowledge and printables that help you understand and apply your learning.

Track your food, hydration, rest, and rewards – without shame. Whether you’re rage-walking through your emotions or just proud you drank a glass of water, this is your space. Fuel yourself like the magnificent, exhausted creature you are.

If your journey hasn’t been linear, or perfect, or loud — you’re not alone. This series is for anyone who’s still trying. And that includes me.

If you’re inspired by this messy journey and looking for gentle ways to explore and affirm your path, my Dare to Dream printables offer reflective prompts, mindful colouring, and quiet validation. Find them on the Ash & Ember Etsy store.