Hello fellow adventurers.
Today’s blog is a little tender. I want to talk to you about my Health, fitness and movement journey — it’s been a complicated road.
If you’ve read my first blog or about me page you’ll know that one day I finally opened my eyes and found myself at the bottoms of a pit.
Not literally.
I didn’t recognise the life I was living.
Nothing looked like what I had ever imagined.
So…
I took the first step to reclaiming me.
I started with my health and with my body.
Because after years of neglect, I was
Tired
Exhausted
Sore
Suffering
Over weight
Overwhelmed
Dying
(Dramatic)
And I knew, I couldn’t keep going like this.
And I knew, it would hurt to try. But it already hurt not to.
So I gave up on starting tomorrow.
And I gave up on being perfect.
And I tried.
Along the way I found so many things that didn’t work for me.
But I didn’t quit. I just showed up again the next day to try again. Or to try something else. And sometimes, scarily, I tried something new.
And, after a lot of trial and error, sometimes I found something that worked.
It was hard to give up on perfect but in the messy process, I learned, I flourished, I flounder and step by messy, painful step, I figured it out.
I knew that my weight loss battle would be 80% what I eat but knowing is not understand and it definitely is not applying.
So I got help.
This time not from a book. Because I’ve read, I read and read and read but (embarrassingly) I never understood.
I found someone I could talk to.
A mentor to teach and guide me.
And a community to celebrate and commiserate whenever the need arises.
Eventually I completely changed what I eat each day but I started slow. I started with the meal I struggled with the most. Breakfast. And then I worked to change the next thing.
I did it through trial and error. I tried new foods. I learnt just how fussy I am.
I struggled with just how hard it can be to find healthy you also enjoy eating.
But I didn’t give up. Even when it wasn’t perfect.
I knew that 20% of my weight loss battle would be exercise. While my main priority was focusing on food, I also wanted to be fit. I wanted to make it up the four flights of stairs at work without dying. I started with walks. Five minutes, around the block, everyday. Then ten minutes. Then twenty.
And then when I was ready I moved on to weights and running.
I made slow and steady my mantra.
I reminded myself I am not running a race.
I’m making a life.
A life I can be proud of. A life I will be happy to live.
And now I wonder.
Can words really hope to capture the struggle?
Some days I cried.
Some I raged.
Some I hate.
Sometimes all I could do was breathe.
And the set backs were real.
I started a learn to run program that sang to my soul.
Then I developed Plantar Fasciitis and despite my stubbornness could no longer endure the pain of running.
I lost kilos.
Then had people who should be my biggest supporters make disparaging comments.
The scale went down.
Then back up.
And my clothes all got too big for me.
But I’m too scared to buy new ones in case o jinx it.
And then I looked into the mirror…
My struggles are proof that this journey is never smooth sailing. It’s a downright bumpy track.
Sometimes those bumps will knock you on your arse.
Let me help you get back up.
Let’s try again together.
In creating Ash & Ember Rising I’ve created a place to share my journey.
A place where we can journey together.
A place to share our adventures.
These are the processes I’ve been using put into printable format.
I hope they can help you too.
Because they are still helping me.
In each page you will find tools to guide you but most importantly you’ll find
Encouragement over guilt
Gentleness
Hope
Fire
Fuel
Realness over expectations
Fire & Fuel
Blogs to share wisdom and knowledge and printables that help you understand and apply your learning.
Track your food, hydration, rest, and rewards – without shame. Whether you’re rage-walking through your emotions or just proud you drank a glass of water, this is your space. Fuel yourself like the magnificent, exhausted creature you are.
If your journey hasn’t been linear, or perfect, or loud — you’re not alone. This series is for anyone who’s still trying. And that includes me.
If you’re inspired by this messy journey and looking for gentle ways to explore and affirm your path, my Dare to Dream printables offer reflective prompts, mindful colouring, and quiet validation. Find them on the Ash & Ember Etsy store.
Ash & Ember Rising 